We Need YOUR Best Melissa McCarthy Jokes!

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  • Tom O’Neil
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    May 13th, 2011
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    #50842

    A while back we did a photo gallery with jokes on the Top 10 Reasons the Golden Globes snubbed Melissa McCarthy. Some of the lines were hilarious, some weak.

    http://www.goldderby.com/films/photos/179/2402/.html

    Now I want to do a similar piece over at Yahoo in the next few days and I want to replace some of the jokes with stronger ones. Do YOU have one? If so, let us use it for the Yahoo piece.

    NOTE: The REAL Reason that HFPA snubbed her was because she didn’t show up for their press conference, of course. I’ll make that the top #1 answer, but let’s lead up with our best jokes … Whatcha got

    TOP 10 REASONS THE GOLDEN GLOBES SNUBBED MELISSA MCCARTHY –

    1.    Secretly believe that she and Ricky Gervais are the same person.

    3.    “Bridesmaids” was good, but it was no “Burlesque.”

    4.    Muammar Qaddafi once called her his favorite actress.

    5.    Already has the Oscar sewn up. Does she need a Golden Globe

    6.    “Mike & Molly” doesn’t air on HBO.

    7.    Granddaughter of Joseph McCarthy?

    8.    Another excuse to use underused catchphrase, “Always the bridesmaid…”

    9.  Confused her with Michele Bachmann.

    10.    She forgot to thank the Hollywood foreign press in her Emmy speech, damn it!

    Reply
    TV12
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    Jun 14th, 2011
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    #50844

    50% of the HFPA is Icelandic and they DO NOT like volcano jokes.

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    Miss Frost
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    #50845

    You might as well save this thread till they announce the Oscar nominations. I’m predicting high snubbage there.

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    TV12
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    #50846

    Probably not. Its in for Original Screenplay and has a VERY good shot for McCarthy. It could even land a BP nom.

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    Jake
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    Jul 2nd, 2011
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    #50847

    After Melissa Leo’s fiasco of a speeches they won’t take any risks anymore and no Melissa will ever be nominated again.

    Or they thought that “Samantha Who?” was the peak of her career and she’s never gonna top that. 

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    Carbon Based Lifeform
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    Jun 20th, 2011
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    #50848

    UMM, I though Melissa McCarthy’s nomination WAS the joke!

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    Tom O’Neil
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    #50849

    Aha, GREAT STUFF, tx, my dear viscious bitches!

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    Spenser Davis
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    May 22nd, 2011
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    #50850

    Jokes? Geez. Let’s think … I’ll edit this as/if I come up with anything.

    I’m guessing that, like her own children, the HPFA just couldn’t get over the sink scene.

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    babypook
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    #50851

    The sink held her weight though, did it not?

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    Trent
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    May 14th, 2011
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    #50852

    The Hollywood FOREIGN Press Association wouldn’t nominate McCarthy’s “all-American girl” character: overweight, knows where the nukes are, and shits in sinks.

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    Tom O’Neil
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    #50853

    THANK, everybody, for participating. Here are your great jokes at Yahoo:

    http://omg.yahoo.com/blogs/golden-globes/top-10-reasons-golden-globes-snubbed-melissa-mccarthy-231417371.html

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