
On Thursday’s “Daily Show,” Trevor Noah looked at President Joe Biden’s first 100 days in office, which the host described as the period in a presidency when the president tries to get their biggest ideas accomplished. “FDR introduced the New Deal, Ronald Reagan rolled back the welfare state, and Bill Clinton installed that stripper pole in the Situation Room,” Noah joked.
To commemorate his 100th day, Joe Biden delivered his first address to a joint session of Congress this week. “Yes, for hundreds of years Joe Biden has sat and watched other presidents give speeches to Congress, but now it was his turn,” Noah said.
Biden laid out his ambitious goals, which include raising the minimum wage to $15, lowering deductibles for working families on Affordable Care Act health plans, banning assault weapons, combating systemic racism, and “ending cancer as we know it.”
“Wow, ending racism and cancer,” Noah marveled. “Biden’s dreaming big. I half expected him to go ‘you know what, f— it, we’re going Mars right now. Get in the rocket, everyone, there’s a rocket outside.”
Noah noted that for a supposed moderate like Biden, this is a very progressive agenda, with proposals like free college and free child care. “You’d think that Bernie was just offscreen, with his fists, like, ‘Don’t you dare forget about student debt, Joe Biden, or I’m gonna shove 99 percent of this fist up your ass!’”
Noah said that Biden had the energy that people always bring to a new job. “Joe Biden’s got that new job enthusiasm, which always fades over time. You know, and right now he’s like ‘I’m changing everything.’ And like a year or so from now, his top priority is going to be angling his computer monitor so that no one can see he’s watching ‘Outlander.’”
Noah thought the over-the-top praise for Biden on MSNBC and CNN, where they compared him to FDR and gushed about the beauty of his “grandfatherly whispery voice,” was a little unseemly. “I like how the news went from ‘We gotta hold those in power accountable,’ to ‘awww, he’s just like my grandpa! I love him so much!’”
Unfortunately for Biden, the country is not just made up of liberal pundits, and the conservative reaction to the speech was very different. On Fox News, they were all terrified of Biden’s supposedly socialist agenda. Noah was exasperated. “At this point, we always know that no matter what Democrats suggest, Republicans are gonna say it’s socialism. This has become a game now. ‘Everything they do is socialist.’ But, ironically, it’s never socialism when Republicans want to give money to big oil companies or help farmers in the midwest,” Noah said. “These politicians are like sports fans now. It’s always a foul when it’s the other team.”
Noah also said that Biden’s speech didn’t just make conservatives angry, it also made them bored and tired. Ted Cruz even fell asleep!
“And I know what you are thinking right now,” Noah said. “You think I’m going to say something like ‘Oh, that’s weird, I thought lizards slept with their eyes open.’ But I’m not going to say that, because honestly, that was the most relatable thing that Ted Cruz has ever done. Because that speech was boring, and when you consider that almost none of Biden’s goals are going to get past Congress, we basically just listened to an old man talk for an hour about his dreams.”
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