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Mallory Archer's Best Insults

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Charles Bright
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  • CharlesBright
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    I’m drawing up a list for our photo galleries of Mallory Archer’s best insults from “Archer” and I want to hear what your personal favorites are! The bitchier, the better! All I ask is to please include the episode it came from. I can’t wait to hear your picks!

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    adamunc
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    “Blood Test”: If I wanted to sit around all day going nowhere, I’d be a teacher.

    “Lo Scandolo”: The classic Irish man’s dilemma–do I eat the potato or let it ferment so I can drink it later?

    “Stage Two”: If I cared about what you do on the weekends, I’d stick a shotgun in my mouth and pull the trigger with my toes!

    “Blood Test”: But if I did want a grandchild, I’d just scrape all your previous mishaps into a big pile and knit a onesie for it.

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    CharlesBright
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    “Lo Scandolo”: The classic Irish man’s dilemma–do I eat the potato or let it ferment so I can drink it later?  

    Which is followed by one of my favorite lines:

    – “Am I going to get the operation father?”

    – “No son. You’re going to die.”

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